Lardasses

I had a grand adventure last night. Ran the Volkswagen out of gas on 70, and because I didn't have the Segway in the back, I had to walk about six miles for gas. Then, putting it in the car, I slipped on some ice and messed up my left shoulder. I now have limited motion in that joint, though my elbow is just fine. Just sort of weird commanding your arm to move and having it ignore you. I feel like Bob Dole.

Today was National Impede The Flow Of Traffic Day. Every West Virginia moron, every Virginia lardass, every Ohio dumbfuck was out specifically to get in my particular way. The favored means of obstruction was, of course, the "Let's Drive 53mph In The Left Lane, Right Next To Another 53-mph Lardass, And Get Offended When People Tell You To Get The Fuck Out Of The Way" tactic.

Just to remind you all, though if you're smart enough to be reading this page without moving your lips, you probably already know: there is nowhere in the United States where the law is anything but "slower traffic keep right." And "slower" is a relative term, so if you're doing 65, I really don't give a fuck if you're proud of your law-abidingness, if I'm doing 75, you get your stupid fucking piece of crap out of that left lane NOW.

That is all.