Worst weekend

I was going to go back and replace the placeholder with real text, but said the hell with it and chose to add a new entry instead.

Executive summary: I got laid Sunday night and hated it, Penny may or may not still be in my life, I adore Mary, and I still don't have a driveway.

OK, now... the details.

Late last week, Penny and I were talking while I was at work, and then again after work, and I heard something in her voice that told me something was really wrong. What eventually came out was that she was completely star-struck by this guy, Steve, that two weeks ago, I was encouraging her to give a second chance. Well, apparently she did. Bigtime. And when the smoke cleared, she basically said that she only wanted to see one person in her life and that person was... Steve.

He can't spell for shit. He has what Penny describes as a "chatty seven-year-old." He has a hairy back, for chrissakes.

But her hormones are raging, and she just feels some sort of insane electricity with him. Not that she didn't feel that with me, but she claims that this is something else, something even more intense.

How it doesn't kill her or erase her laptop's hard drive, I don't know.

I spent the worst weekend of my life. I knew she was with him, or he with her, and I spent my weekend with Mary.

There was a short side diversion I should mention... a woman I met online named Olivia. Recently moved to this area, and she said she was looking for was a casual friendship, but after we spent a few hours out talking and having a drink on Friday night, and ended up practically fucking standing-up next to her car on a sidestreet in Frederick, I got the sense that she was looking for something more than just friends.

I went over to see her Sunday night, and we'd barely finished our wine when she had my pants unzipped, and eventually took me upstairs, where she undressed faster than any woman I'd ever known.

But she was very... strange. First, she had hinted that she "really likes her toys." Boy, did she. Y'ever hear that Mojo Nixon song called "(She's) Vibrator-Dependent"? Or did you see that episode of Sex And The City where Charlotte orders a Rampant Rabbit and ends up never leaving her apartment? This woman must have owned stock in Duracell or something, because she had that thing running full-bore within about 30 seconds. Popped a condom on me, and pulled me inside her in about five seconds, and she was coming barely a minute later, her head bumping so hard against the headboard I was worried she'd break something.

And then it was over. Sure, I enjoyed it, but it was as if I was just another battery-operated toy in her apartment. We talked a while, but she was adamant about not wanting any cuddling. I felt rather foreign and while we left on nice terms, I sensed that I wouldn't likely see her again. I was right... Monday she sent me a classic "it was nice to meet you and good luck in your search" email. I moved her to the "old ad people" category in my Sony Clie and returned my attention to real relationships.

Monday, I spent with Mary. We went to a picnic with some friends of hers and had a good time, though I have to admit, picnics are sort of weird when everyone but you is on the Atkins Diet. I stayed with Mary Monday night -- no sex -- and Tuesday, went to wait for the pavers.

An hour after getting home, the phone rang. Due to the weather, the pavers canceled yet again. So I have no pavement still. Fourth big month! I cleaned the kitchen and fed the cats, then went to work.

After work, I met Gretchen and Penny to do trivia at the bar I go to. Gretchen and Penny wanted to meet, and despite the hurt, I agreed. They met, talked a lot, we tied for 2nd place, and we all started to go home.

Penny came over and sat in the Saab, and we talked for a couple of hours. No holds barred. I told her I wanted to stay in her life. I told her how close I had come to deciding to make her the only woman in my romantic life (which was actually true) but now that possibility seemed remote (which is also true). I told her that even if stuff didn't work out with the Hairy-Back Steveosaur, I was worried her disappointment would be so great she'd come back to me all dented up, and I hated that.

It rained a lot, too. We got rained on, we yelled at each other, we kissed, we cried a lot, we came to few decisions except that, as planned, we would spend next weekend -- my 41st birthday -- together. Probably no sex, though -- she picked up a urinary tract infection or some other such damn thing, probably from fucking the hell out of the Steve last weekend. I haven't even met him, and I already don't like him. Don't interfere with my sex life, O Steve Of The Poor Spelling!

So where are we now? Fuck if I know. I love and miss Penny. I love and adore Mary. I don't regret fucking Olivia. I wish my driveway was done. And I want it to stop raining for a little while.

Soon.