I have a new car and a wacky girlfriend

I didn't get the diesel Passat off eBay. It sold this morning for nearly eight thousand dollars... almost $3500 more than its book value. I counted myself out.

I did, however, buy nearly the identical car in Annapolis tonight for about two thousand dollars less. I am actually happier with this car, because it was owned by someone who didn't drive the living shit out of it, and who didn't smoke in it. So, Friday, I will be the owner of a black 1996 Passat turbodiesel wagon with a couple of minor and fiddly problems but with a good heart and a trailer hitch.

That's the good stuff.

I also have a girlfriend who is freaking out and panicking about some things in her life that would honestly be solved if she just moved down here in August or September instead of November or February. She went down to sign a new lease, having been month-to-month since February, to find that she has to sign on for a six-month minimum at a higher rate. She had figured she could go month-to-month again. She also found out that her internship won't be covering any of her health care until December -- never mind that it's at a hospital -- and she has a bunch of medical costs she expected would be covered.

I learned years ago that most people don't actually know how to operate Planet Earth. They don't know what questions to ask, or how to avoid being hosed, and as a result, they get hosed. They pay for things they don't want, longer than they want, and feel like they have no choice.

I have given Suzanne carte blanche to not worry about that shit, and she still worries about it and worse, takes action based on that worry.

Take my car, which gets better mileage than your Impala and has overhead lighting inside (Impalas have floor lights, which I guess is good if your eyes are in your ankles). It's already paid for, and holds more stuff.

Come live with me, the mortgage is paid, the bills are paid, the cats love you. Your rabbits will have a room to themselves. You will have all the time you want to find the right job instead of just any job. Let me worry, I'm better at it than you.

I offer all this stuff, and she dithers.

I am not doing anything a friend wouldn't do for a friend.

That's how I am.

Still, she dithers.

I hate dithering.

I sure hope I like the diesel. I think it'll be easier to persuade the TDI to come live with me now than it'll be to persuade Suzanne to get the hell out of where she is and come somewhere better.